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High Holy Days Encourage Reflection
Last year’s High Holy Days came right after the violence and grief of September 11th. This year has brought yet more tragedy and destruction in Israel and throughout the world. We can only continue to live our lives, and to work and pray for peace.
Leslie Polss addressed the congregation at last year’s services with words that deserve repeating now. She spoke of the landscapes that have changed forever.
"On September 11th, the Manhattan skyline was shattered. A gaping hole was blown into one side of the Pentagon. And an enormous crater was carved into a field in western Pennsylvania. These are physical changes to the landscape of these places. They are easy to identify.
The response to such physical change is simple, at least in theory. The solution is to rebuild. And indeed, we've heard on the news that the Pentagon already has plans to rebuild and strengthen its edifice. Mayor Giuliani has vowed to rebuild at the site of Ground Zero in Manhattan. These may not be easy things to do. In fact, they will be very difficult things to do. But at least it's easy to recognize what it is that needs to be done.
What about changes to the social and political landscape of our country? These changes are more difficult to recognize, but they certainly have catapulted us into a national debate about the character of our society. And both the best and worst of that character has been on display.
There has been a virtual outpouring of patriotism. We've all felt a sense of pulling together, a feeling of being unified in the face of a disaster. This crisis has even brought out the best in our politicians. Republicans and Democrats, conservatives and liberals, all have been reaching across the aisle, bridging the partisan gap to enact legislation together.
At the same time, we've experienced a growing distrust of anyone who looks different from us. There has been an unfortunate backlash of hate crimes against Muslims, Arabs, or anyone who even looks Middle Eastern. Our government is calling up troops and our Attorney General, John Ashcroft, is seeking greater power to conduct surveillance on residents and citizens of the U.S. I understand the motivation for such a request, but it worries me. I can't help wondering how many of our civil liberties we are willing to relinquish in our efforts to feel safe again.
If the solution to the damage in the physical landscape is to rebuild, can a similar solution work here? Is it possible to rebuild our appreciation for the diversity we find in our country?
I know that Congregation Beth Ahavah participates in interfaith activities with gay and lesbian Christian organizations in the city. Perhaps there's a gay and lesbian Muslim organization in the area that we should be reaching out to as well. Because I believe that the best weapon we have against fear is knowledge and education. We simply need to know more about each other.
As for my own personal landscape, the High Holy Day season is usually a time for calm introspection. I reflect on the past year, think about my own conduct and what I need to change. But this year, my thoughts are in turmoil. I find myself awash in a sea of anger and even hatred.
What do I do with such feelings? How do I reign in my thoughts when they are in such disarray? The refrain that I hear in my head is Rebuild, Rebuild, Rebuild. For me, rebuilding means reaffirming my relationships with family, friends, and co-workers. It means rededicating myself to the communities, like B.A., to which I belong."
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President’s Message
by Marcia Kesten
As you are reading The Shofar, we are already immersed in the High Holy Day season. Elul began August 9. During the month of Elul, the last month of our year, Jews sound the shofar every day. Just as on Rosh Hashanah and at the end of Yom Kippur, the shofar is sounded during Elul as a wake-up call: It is time to wake up and take stock of our lives. It is time for teshuvah (repentance). It is time for looking back. This year, why not apply "my" principles while you are examining your life?
- Where did you put your awareness in the last year?
- How many of your goals came to fruition?
- Did you make some goals and then, for whatever reason, forget about them?
- What did you expect to accomplish? (This question is the most difficult. We do not like to think that we
would set a goal and in our heart of hearts, did not expect to achieve it.)
It is also time for tzedakah (righteousness —which has come to mean a way to redress the inequities of the world through giving of our own resources). This coming year, think of being a little more generous with your time, and with your money.
According to kabbalistic writings, life is about receiving and giving. For life to continue and flourish, there must be receiving and giving; giving not back, but forward. The book I am reading makes an analogy of the bodies of water in Israel. The Jordan River receives from the Mediterranean Sea, flows (gives) to the Sea of Galilee. Then the water continues…but stops at the Dead Sea. Why is it the Dead Sea? Because the water just stops there. There is nowhere to flow. Life by its nature wants to give; when we receive and do not give forward, life stops thriving and begins to die. Again, this year, think of being more generous, with your time and with your money.
Then there is tefillah(prayer). We will certainly have our share of communal prayer during High Holiday services, but how about during Elul? This year, why not begin praying earlier? ray that you can achieve your goals and feel good about yourself in the process. Ask G-d for help.
In the next issue of The Shofar, I’m going to share some thoughts on my own spiritual journey. My journey has led to a philosophy which can be summed up as "What the mind can achieve and believe, a person can achieve." My plan as president is to apply this principle whenever and as often as I can. I envision healthy growth for our synagogue. Please envision this with me as we move into a new year.
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Introducing Your Board of Directors…
With Their Own Inimitable Styles
Gloria Becker
"During my coming out, my therapist got me to agree to come to Beth Ahavah just to meet people and see what it was about. I had always been active in a synagogue, so this was a place that could be a new home for me. It was my New Year’s resolution for 1996 (the only New Year’s resolution I ever kept). I arrived for services on the first Shabbat of the New Year. Since then, I have gotten involved in the life of my synagogue community by leading services, shiva minyans and unveilings, serving on the board of the Women’s Chavurah, helping six of our congregants become Bar and Bat Mitzvah, meeting my life-partner, and becoming a member of the Board. I am as active in my synagogue now as I once was in the "straight" synagogue that rejected me eight years ago when I came out.
This October, I will celebrate my fortieth birthday. I serve as Educational Director of Congregation Or Ami, a mainstream, suburban, Reform congregation. I just completed my Masters in Jewish Education at Gratz College. I hold a BA in Accounting from Muhlenberg College.
I look forward to helping Beth Ahavah grow and prosper over the coming years."
Jocelyn Block
Member of BA since 1997. Attorney in the Office of the Public Defender in Camden since 1980. First elected to the Board in 2000. Served for two years on the Executive Committee as secretary. Secretary of the Women's Chavurah/WRJ. Previously served on the Long Range Planning Committee. Purim shpiel regular.
Jack Butler
"I was born and raised in West Philadelphia. I graduated from Central High School and from Temple University with a degree in accounting. I spent most of my working life as a teacher in the Philadelphia school system and in restaurant management. Right now I’m an accountant with the Philadelphia Corporation for Aging, a non-profit organization. When I have the time, I enjoy cooking, or better yet, trying new restaurants!
I look forward to serving as Beth Ahavah’s treasurer this year."
Abbe Forman
Abbe has been a member of Beth Ahavah since 1995. She is currently serving as Vice President for Programming on the Board of Directors. She is a founding member and president of the Beth Ahavah chapter of Women of Reform Judaism (Women’s Chavurah). She has served on many committees including Membership and Gay-Straight Dialogue and has the distinction of co-writing the Purim shpiel. Abbe is a computer programmer-analyst for a large non-profit company. She shares a home in King of Prussia with her partner, Shelly; also two teenage stepchildren, (oy vey, what was she thinking?!), doggie perfection, six cats and three birds.
Marcia S. Kesten
"I come to this position of president of our synagogue with a great deal of volunteer leadership work experience:
- Congregation Beth Ahavah Board of Directors- 3 years
- Fundraising for 25th anniversary tribute book
- Rabbi search committees
- Long range planning committee
- Shabbat service leader at BA
- Past President of Pennsylvania Chiropractic Association, Phila region
- Present treasurer of PCA, Phila Region
- Facilitated chiropractic seminars for PCA
- Taught Homeopathic medicine study groups
- Past board member of Garden Court Community Association (GCCA)
- Treasurer, GCCA
- Anti-graffiti chair, GCCA
- Past board member of Firehouse Farmer’s Market, Inc.
- Board member of Spay and Save (animal welfare organization)."
Shelly Komito
Shelly has been a member of Beth Ahavah since 1995. During that time, she has served several terms on the Board. She most recently served on the Executive Committee as Vice President for Programming. Shelly has served as secretary, and has been on various committees including Education, Membership, and Social Action. Shelly is also a founding member of Beth Ahavah’s chapter of Women of Reform Judaism (Women’s Chavurah). Shelly has co-written and directed the last two Purim shpiels. She is a physical therapist and works at Mercy Home Health Services as Rehabilitation Manager. Mother of two teenagers (ouch!), Shelly and her partner, Abbe, live in King of Prussia with their perfect dog, six cats, and three birds.
Roger Margulies
I initially joined the synagogue around 1997. I have always been interested in Judaism and my Jewish roots. Although both my parents are Jewish, I had very little exposure to the religious aspects of Judaism while growing up. My family did not belong to or go to synagogue and I was more familiar with Christian holidays than Jewish ones. Since joining BA, I have claimed my Jewishness. I made many friends and attended Bar/Bat Mitzvah classes. In 1999, I had a Bar Mitzvah at age 52 and feel I accomplished something I missed as a child. I am a proud father of two sons, Max, 16, and Sam, 12. I went to Tulane for a Bachelors and Villanova for an MA in Education (Counseling). I have worked for social service agencies, the Departments of Navy and Defense and the City of Philadelphia during my lengthy career. I currently serve as Assistant Deputy Mayor for the Mayor's Commission on People with Disabilities.
I have been recruited to the Board to serve as a resident expert on disability issues. I will work hard to make BA more inclusive of people with disabilities and as physically accessible as possible. I will also work to ensure BA continues to have many social activities and educational events so gay Jews can gather and meet.
More from Your Board next time!
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News from Israel
Excerpted from an article in Ha-aretz
July 9, 2002, Tel-Aviv
Gay congress draws proud Jews from around the globe
By Daphna Berman
Depleted in numbers but not in spirit, gay and lesbian Jews from around the globe converged on Israel this week for the biennial convention of the World Congress of Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual and Transgender Jews, at Kibbutz Givat Haviva. Nothing short of regional warfare, declared Congress President Scott Gansl, would have convinced him to alter his plans to hold the event in Israel.
A featured guest and speaker at last week's Gay Pride parade in Tel Aviv, American-born Gansl says he has always seen Israel as a "a light unto the nations," and claims that it is far more advanced than the United States in its pro-gay legislation.
Some participants arrived early to take part in Israeli Pride Week and in Tel Aviv's Gay Pride parade last Friday, where, on behalf of the Congress, Gansl addressed the crowd, echoing comments by K’nesset Members Yossi Sarid (Meretz) and Yael Dayan (Labor) in support of the local gay-lesbian community.
Marching along the streets of Tel Aviv, he said, it was almost impossible not to be impressed by the turnout, estimated to have been tens of thousands of people. He saw people swept from sidewalks and descending from balconies. "Everybody loves a parade," he says.
He was not surprised that the parade is one of the largest held in the city every year. Israel, he explains, has long stood out for its democracy and pluralism. The Jewish character of the state does not infringe on his personal freedom, he believes, adding that he is excited by a recent Israeli Supreme Court anti-discrimination ruling with respect to the work place. Unlike the U.S., Israel also has an "open policy" for gays and lesbians serving in the military.
Gansl sees substantial differences between American and Israeli GLBT activists. American Jews are not familiar with the "type of Jew that exists in Israel." Israelis, he explains, have never experienced discrimination as Jews. He also finds it difficult to understand Israelis who are so secular that they don't identify themselves as being Jewish. When they travel outside the country, he remarks, "they don't 'come out' as Jews."
A self-proclaimed "traditional" as opposed to "religious" Jew, Gansl sees a culture gap between him and his Israeli co-activists, even on a personal level. He himself has become more affiliated as a Jew since coming out, and is very active in his local GLBT synagogue.
As for the social aspects of gay-lesbian culture, Gansl sees Tel Aviv as the GLBT capital of Israel and says it's a definite hot spot with a nightlife for gays and lesbians that rivals that of the Greek Islands and Amsterdam. The city's weather is a little too hot for his taste, but the "bold, brash, and secular" culture of Tel Aviv is exciting and inviting, if unfamiliar.
He noted that the Tel Aviv GLBT office recently hosted an Israeli-Palestinian pride party. Despite the political situation, over 180 guests arrived, half from the West Bank and Gaza.
Gansl added that he feels at home here: "I don't see [just] tolerance. I see acceptance." Still, he admits, he usually wears a skullcap, but has kept it in his backpack during his trip. Because he doesn't speak Hebrew, he feels people may be suspicious if he wears it.
Gansl stayed with members of the local GLBT community in Be'er Sheva last week. He attended Shabbat evening services and several members couldn't understand why he wanted to go. They naturally assumed that participating in services would be oppressive and antagonistic, he explained. He tried to convince them his Jewish experience was anything but that, but isn't sure he got the message across. Still, he's determined to find a niche for himself in Israeli and Jewish society.
Meanwhile, he downplayed the obstacles he has faced in those worlds, including the fact that the World Congress of GLBT Jews was recently denied membership in the World Jewish Congress, a rejection which he attributes to bureaucracy. He himself still hasn't given up on the idea of joining the WJC. "Being gay," he says, "has taught me to be resilient."
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BA is Now a "Fringe" Venue
Robin Eisenberg, a BA past-president, will be staging a workshop production of the play Stop Kiss by Diana Son at BA as part of the Unfiltered Fringe Festival. "Since BA is located in Old City and has a great space, and since Stop Kiss is about two women who fall in love, it seemed like a perfect match!" says Robin. "The Board of BA graciously allowed us to use the space during the Fringe. I'm hoping that Stop Kiss will bring people to BA who might not know it exists and BA people to see Stop Kiss."
Stop Kiss will play at BA on Sunday, Sept. 1st (2pm and 7pm), Wednesday, Sept. 4th (7:30pm) and Thursday, Sept. 12th (7:30pm). A wine and cheese discussion will follow the performances.
Tickets for the Fringe production are $5 and are available:
- At the Fringe Festival Box Office beginning August 19th at The Hub, 2nd and Race Streets
- By phone at 215-413-1318 beginning August 12th
- Online at
www.pafringe.org beginning 8/19/02
- At the door ½ hour before each performance
For more information, visit the Swerve webpage at
www.smallchunks.com/swerve
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Ritually Speaking
by Ricardo Ben Safed
July was a very exciting month as we welcomed Susan Falk, our new rabbinic intern. We hope you will join us for services throughout the summer. When Susan leads services, please welcome her to our congregational family. Beginning this fall, Susan will lead a monthly Shabbat Torah study and service. Watch your mail for further details and dates.
ws observed Tisha B’Av (the 9th of Av) on the 18th of July this year. Tisha B’Av is a day of mourning and fasting, commemorating the destruction of the first and second Temples in Jerusalem in 586 BCE and 70 CE, respectively. It is also believed other significant tragedies of Jewish history occurred on this date: the final expulsion from Spain during the Inquisition and particularly deadly pogroms and incidents during the Shoah. Jews fast, perform mourning rites (not shaving, abstaining from sexual contact, tearing their clothes, fasting and praying). It is customary to read Eicha, the Book of Lamentations, on Tisha B’Av.
My Sephardic rabbi in my former congregation, Sha’arei Tikvah (Gates of Hope), said about the 9th of Av, "If Murphy had a day (remember Murphy's Law!) ...whatever could go wrong, will." My rabbi used to say Tisha B'Av was the karma created by Murphy's Law. He said Murphy's Law governs the world of our five senses. (If you are sensing he is a Kabbalist, you're right!) Everything that can possibly go wrong, will go wrong. Even when things go right, we know they'll change because we live under an endless cycle of ups and downs. Tisha B'Av is a time to commemorate some of the downs of our people.
August Highlights
In August, we will welcome many special guests. On August 9th, we will have welcomed Gabriel Lampert, a native son of Philadelphia, and contributing author to Found Tribe: Jewish Coming Out Stories. Gabriel currently serves as professor of English at the University of New Mexico.
Before services on August 9th, we met David Shneer and Caryn Aviv, the editors of the new book, Queer Jews. They spoke about and read from their book. Copies of the book were available for sale, before services, courtesy of Giovanni’s Room, which is co-sponsoring this event.
On August 16th, we will welcome Carrie Jacobs, PhD, founder and executive director of The Attic, Philadelphia’s community center for GLBTQ youth. Come and bring your favorite young person along to hear what’sgoing on in our own community.
The Ritual Committee is always interested in your input, so please feel free to share your questions, suggestions and compliments with us. We also have seats open on the committee, so why not consider joining us as we plan religious programming for our community?
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The Speakers Series Continues
by Naomi Segal
BA’s Friday night Speakers Series continued in June with a presentation by Rabbi Sue Levi Elwell, Regional Director of the Union of American Hebrew Congregations (UAHC). Rabbi Elwell shared with us her thoughts on the future of gay synagogues in the 21st century, exhorting us to reach out so everyone would know about B.A. We shared a brachah with Sue and her partner, Nurit, in honor of their anniversary, as together we all celebrated gay pride.
On July 26th, BA hosted the legendary Henri David, joined by his partner, Paul Struck. Henri David is only a jeweler, he says—a nice Jewish boy from Strawberry Mansion who owns a store. Nah! Henri David is the man behind the biggest and baddest Halloween Ball in Philadelphia—this October celebrating 34 years of outrageous costumes and glorious fun. He is also a generous and frequently requested MC, hosting everything from Gay Pride parades and fairs to the Morris Animal Shelter’s annual fundraiser, to the Easter Parade!
After hosting David Shneer and Caryn Aviv on August 9th, on August 16th, we will welcome Carrie Jacobs, Ph.D., founder and executive director of The Attic, Philadelphia’s Community Center for GLBTQ youth.
Oh yes, September? We’re taking the month off to celebrate the High Holy Days, Succoth, and Simchat Torah. Shanah Tovah!
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BA Welcomes Rabbinic Intern Susan Falk
Beth Ahavah’s Board of Directors recently established the Rabbinical Student Internship Program as a way to bring resources and energy to Beth Ahavah and to provide growth opportunities for gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgendered rabbinical students. As part of the one-year appointment, Susan Falk and future interns will lead Friday night services once a month, conduct monthly Shabbat Torah study sessions, provide bikur holim and pastoral counseling services, and facilitate educational programs. Funds for the internship were donated as part of a special fundraising drive led by Beth Ahavah’s Past President David Wohlsifer.
Ms. Falk is a third-year student at the Reconstructionist Rabbinical College in Wyncote. Originally from New York, Ms. Falk is an alumna of Barnard College. Before moving to the Philadelphia area, she worked for 11 years for Women in Need, a non-profit organization serving homeless women with substance abuse problems. While she was growing up, Ms. Falk had thought about being a rabbi, but it was rare to find a female rabbi, and gay or lesbian rabbis were unheard of. As those things began to change in liberal Judaism, she began her rabbinical studies in 2000.
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Annual Congregational Meeting Ends Early
by Jocelyn Block
BA’s annual Congregational Meeting was held on June 13th. Outgoing President David Wohlsifer called the meeting to order and led the opening prayer. He thanked the Executive Committee, the rest of the Board of Directors, and the committee chairs for their service to the BA community. He spoke briefly about the rewards and the frustrations of his presidency.
Treasurer David Gold reported we will end the year with a surplus of between $3000-$4000. The other good news was that dues were not raised for the 2002-2003 budget. The budget for the next fiscal year was passed unanimously in what was most likely the shortest time in BA’s history.
Elections for the Board of Directors were conducted in a similarly expeditious manner. The proposed slate was elected with no nominations from the floor.
Newly elected Board members are Jack Butler, Roger Margulies, Steve Jacobson, and Gloria Becker. Scott Gansl and Jocelyn Block were reelected. Marcia Kesten, Abbe Forman, Shelly Komito and David Wohlsifer (as past-president) continue to serve on the Board.
The evening’s liveliest debate was a proposed by-laws amendment to allow the inclusion of the word "transgender" in our byline. Feelings ran strong on both sides of the issue, with added controversy over terms such as "queer" and "intersexed". Another proposal was made to amend our byline to be simultaneously all-inclusive and non-specific, along the lines of "people of diverse sexual and gender identities". Although this proposal was generally favored, the discussion was ultimately tabled and the motion for the amendment was withdrawn. It was resolved, however, that discussion of this subject will continue throughout the year until a consensus can be reached.
The meeting was formally adjourned at approximately 8:30, undoubtedly setting a BA record for brevity!
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